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Topic: Guys, something is really wrong (Read 619 times) previous topic - next topic

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  • ksen
Guys, something is really wrong
I've never really been afraid of where we might be going as a country.  Yeah things are screwed up but when aren't they screwed up?  We seem to always be able to muddle along doing what we do.

But this weekend, yesterday really, changed that a bit.  I am actually now afraid of where we might be heading.

I made my annual visit to see my mother yesterday.  She lives a couple of miles from me but for reasons I don't ever interact with that part of my family.  Anyway, we were sitting on the back porch with my sisters and a couple of cousins and for some weird reason #BLM came up.  Now, my family is very apolitical so that this topic came up shocked me a little bit.  But then my mother actually for really real in real life says, "A black person told me, now remember this is a black person saying it, that you have black people and you have niggers."

My mom unironically dropped the "nigger" bomb . . . a BUNCH of times!

This is the woman that would have washed my mouth out with soap if I had said that growing up.

And that sent chills down my spine and made me start to literally fear the future.

  • SkepticTank
  • Global Moderator
  • Calmer than you are
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #1
It's ok, because her black friend said it.

  • osmanthus
  • Administrator
  • Fingerer of piglets
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #2
Ok, but that brings to mind a Chris Rock skit where he says he loves black people but he hates "niggers". He defines the latter as basically gangsters or wannabes, and similar twits (I could find the video if necessary). So, it is possible that your mum actually was told exactly that by a black person. Just giving her the benefit of the doubt here.
Truth is out of style

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #3
I imagine placating white people you don't want to argue with by saying shit like that is a kind of self protection, separating oneself from a criminal element within one's minority group.

You never hear white people say there's white people and then there are biker gangs.

Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #4
I'm sorry, buddy. It must be really hard to hear that from someone you love.

  • osmanthus
  • Administrator
  • Fingerer of piglets
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #5
Well in Chris Rock's case it wasn't self protection. The audience were mostly black people.
Truth is out of style

  • osmanthus
  • Administrator
  • Fingerer of piglets
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #6
Truth is out of style

  • MikeS
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #7
I made my annual visit to see my mother yesterday.  She lives a couple of miles from me but for reasons I don't ever interact with that part of my family.  Anyway, we were sitting on the back porch with my sisters and a couple of cousins and for some weird reason #BLM came up.  Now, my family is very apolitical so that this topic came up shocked me a little bit.  But then my mother actually for really real in real life says, "A black person told me, now remember this is a black person saying it, that you have black people and you have niggers."
Is THIS what she was describing?



Because, if so,  I have a fairly simple answer to her concerns.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #8
Not sure I want to compare wealthy famous comedian with average black person with white friends.

Then again, it's the US. Regardless of Chris Rock et al, even edgy black teens here aren't prone to using the word casually, at least not in my experience. Any time I've heard Ksen's Mom's quote, it's been from a white person who is reluctant to entirely let go their racist past but has discovered there are black people, colleagues, friends, doctors, etc., that they personally like, trust and admire. So they make a distinction.

  • osmanthus
  • Administrator
  • Fingerer of piglets
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #9
Famous comedian set the precedent, and it obviously resonated with a lot of average black people. And that was 20 years ago, so it's well known and has been for ages.

And I could give you an anecdote from a bloke in Philadelphia, which is that in his experience it was common for younger black people there to use the word without even considering it to be edgy, and without even referring to other black people. He gave the example of "them Irish niggers" as being usage he had heard. IOW, it had morphed into being just another generic word in their slang. At least in Philly anyway.

Reliable source, BTW, and defo not racist. Was a member at CEMB, but died recently.
Truth is out of style

  • ksen
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #10
I made my annual visit to see my mother yesterday.  She lives a couple of miles from me but for reasons I don't ever interact with that part of my family.  Anyway, we were sitting on the back porch with my sisters and a couple of cousins and for some weird reason #BLM came up.  Now, my family is very apolitical so that this topic came up shocked me a little bit.  But then my mother actually for really real in real life says, "A black person told me, now remember this is a black person saying it, that you have black people and you have niggers."
Is THIS what she was describing?



Because, if so,  I have a fairly simple answer to her concerns.

I think she was describing the ones that don't act white.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #11
Well yeah, Canada's always a bit behind the times with American slang.

  • osmanthus
  • Administrator
  • Fingerer of piglets
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #12
Of course, Ksen could just show his mother the other famous Chris Rock skit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPDetBACaU0
Truth is out of style

  • MikeS
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #13
I think she was describing the ones that don't act white.
What does this mean?  I've heard a lot of 'definitions' about it but nothing that could be termed "main stream" or "generic".

  • meepmeep
  • Administrator
  • zombiecat queen
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #14
And I could give you an anecdote from a bloke in Philadelphia, which is that in his experience it was common for younger black people there to use the word without even considering it to be edgy, and without even referring to other black people.

You don't really know what you're talking about, here.

It's okay. We understand you're Australian, buddy.  :unsmith:

  • SkepticTank
  • Global Moderator
  • Calmer than you are
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #15
Do you guys remember there was a pretty famous rap group in the 80s and 90s named NWA?

  • MikeS
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #16
Nice White Americans?

  • ksen
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #17
I think she was describing the ones that don't act white.
What does this mean?  I've heard a lot of 'definitions' about it but nothing that could be termed "main stream" or "generic".


It means that sometime when I wasn't looking my mom seems to have turned into a racist asshole . . . along with the rest of my family. :sadcheer:

  • meepmeep
  • Administrator
  • zombiecat queen
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #18
I think she was describing the ones that don't act white.
What does this mean?  I've heard a lot of 'definitions' about it but nothing that could be termed "main stream" or "generic".


It means that sometime when I wasn't looking my mom seems to have turned into a racist asshole . . . along with the rest of my family. :sadcheer:

My family's always been racist (and failing to grasp the absurdity of being racist in a country that doesn't consider you to be part of the white majority), and my in-laws are only a bit better. And some of my idiot dumbass ignorant coworkers just can't fucking help themselves in talking trash about immigrants and Hispanics right in front of my face, with zero apparent awareness of what they're doing. I've gotten really good at staring blankly, waiting for them to shut the fuck up. Hang in there, buddy.  :hug:

Incidentally, your mom is why Chris Rock disavows that bit and will never perform it again. Fucking white people have to ruin everything, even crappy, stale comedy routines.

Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #19
Keen, your mom is what, 75-80? What she thinks is not indicative of where the country is headed.
Love is like a magic penny
 if you hold it tight you won't have any
if you give it away you'll have so many
they'll be rolling all over the floor

Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #20
Just saying
Love is like a magic penny
 if you hold it tight you won't have any
if you give it away you'll have so many
they'll be rolling all over the floor

  • ksen
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #21
Keen, your mom is what, 75-80? What she thinks is not indicative of where the country is headed.

67

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #22
Both sides of my currently living family are pretty decently non-racist, except for the often appalling Florida cousins. One of my grandmothers was pretty awful (in multiple ways), which was weird seeing as she hardly ever saw anyone who wasn't bright English Canadian white in her entire life other than the FN ladies who used to visit every summer to sell neat stuff they made. She warned me once about dating 'Negros', as she'd seen some TV show that had interracial couples or something. Was pleased to be able to tell her I was dating a six foot tall Chinese guy at the time. She really was awful.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #23
Keen, your mom is what, 75-80? What she thinks is not indicative of where the country is headed.

67
That's only two years older than me. :ohdear:

  • ravenscape
  • Administrator
  • Triggered
Re: Guys, something is really wrong
Reply #24
I think she was describing the ones that don't act white.
What does this mean?  I've heard a lot of 'definitions' about it but nothing that could be termed "main stream" or "generic".


It means that sometime when I wasn't looking my mom seems to have turned into a racist asshole . . . along with the rest of my family. :sadcheer:

I know those feels.