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Messages - Patronus Potter

Remember when Guapo thought Trump was going to ban bump stocks and increase background checks? What was that, 12 hours ago?
But did he major in STEM or in being a snowflake?
The kids can earn some extra cash and learn business skills by selling drugs to their guards.
I assume these virtual schools will come with virtual lunches.

The payments put former Trump bodyguard Keith Schiller back in the spotlight at a time when he may be of interest to investigators regarding :pisstape: his :pisstape: knowledge :pisstape: of :pisstape: intimate :pisstape: actions :pisstape: involving :pisstape: Trump.

"If you want to stop school shootings"
Ben Shapiro is a fucking moron. *looks in the mirror* yep, that's what an intelligent person actually looks like
Politics and Current Events / Re: The Peter Theil thread
I'm sure this has nothing to do with the legions of models and their youthful blood to be found in LA.
Two things jumped out at me from Trump's speech: something about "creating a culture that respects life" and "working on the difficult problem of mental health". Maybe it would be better to just forget about this.
I was going to post a joke list of Trump's solutions and one of them was "End the greatest witch hunt of all time so Trump can focus on protecting are children" but it's real :(
Politics and Current Events / Re: The Fourth Estate
Sarah Jeong
Laura Hudson
Lindy West (who even already writes for NYT)

 - 3 much better qualified women who I, a non-media person, came up with off the top of my head
Here's how the program would work: Imagine a woman named Mary Turner, who lives in Wheeling, West Virginia. She was recently laid off from a chicken-processing plant and makes ends meet by walking and taking care of her neighbors' pets. Mary could expand her little business by hiring some workers, but no one in the area would accept a wage she can afford. Mary goes online--to a new kind of international gig economy website, a Fiverr for immigrants--and applies to sponsor a migrant. She enters information about what she needs: someone with rudimentary English skills, no criminal record and an affection for animals. She offers a room in her basement, meals and $5 an hour. (Sponsors under this program would be exempt from paying minimum wage.)

I call this brilliant new idea... inblentured smurvitude
Politics and Current Events / Re: Trumpocalypse

Resurrecting a failed idea and selling it by comparing it to a new idea which is also failing.
Politics and Current Events / Re: Comic relief thread
So example, very occupate
Politics and Current Events / Re: The Fourth Estate
Paying conservatives to have idiotic opinions is the worst function of journalism
Politics and Current Events / Re: Trumpocalypse
Guessing Don Jr had his online source send cocaine addressed to his wife "just in case"

Why do this when you can order a "filet-o-fish"?
It is very Personal and Political
Politics and Current Events / Re: Comic relief thread

No need for eye or respiratory protection.

I'm not a civil engineer or anything, but can't you just use a bulldozer? Picking up the trash from the landfill is not the problem that needs to be solved here.
the last jewish holiday event i went to was a hanukkah party and they sang the adam sandler song, that seems worse than anything recited at a seder tbh

The seder is torture because you have to sit through a bunch of bullshit before you can start eating the food.
Nazi Party dot reddit dot com?
Please add PlaidTheImpaler to the list of those needing to be guillotined already.
Are you saying the Arc de Triomphe is a participation trophy?
Politics and Current Events / Re: Trumpocalypse
You should not have a "good chunk" in bonds depending on your age. 90-100% equity in your 20's is fine because you have decades to recover! But either way pay zero attention to that shit except maybe a couple of times a year, buy index funds and mirror Vanguard target date retirement funds or just buy those if you're lazy and willing to pay a tiny bit more in fees.

mods please relocate this post to the "guillotine these fuckers" thread tia
I just turned 40 :(

and so will potter any month now iirc

old folks like us can't afford to be so reckless

Look at it this way, only like 5% of humans ever born have lived to be 40, so even if we lose everything and die of hypothermia in some filthy ditch, we can't complain.