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Topic: I've returned to Jesus (Read 704 times) previous topic - next topic

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  • Brother Daniel
  • Global Moderator
  • predisposed to antagonism
I've returned to Jesus
Just kidding.

But it would be nice if this forum had some non-GIA threads.

  • VoxRat
  • wtactualf
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #1
I think meepmeep should weigh in on every Greatest Iams thread with nutrition comparisons with other pet food brands.
"I understand Donald Trump better than many people because I really am a lot like him." - Dave Hawkins

Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #2
Start a thread about the Jefferson Bible and how really extraordinary it is that he managed to do that with the otherwise incomprehensible mishmash of Paul and others.
Love is like a magic penny
 if you hold it tight you won't have any
if you give it away you'll have so many
they'll be rolling all over the floor

  • Brother Daniel
  • Global Moderator
  • predisposed to antagonism
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #3
That would be an excellent idea -- if I actually knew anything about it.

Something for me to look into.  Thanks.  :)

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #4
Just kidding.

But it would be nice if this forum had some non-GIA threads.
Yes, it would.

Not enough theists to make a golf foursome here these days, though, at least two of them are lunatics, and I'm pretty sure the third is tired of apologetics and I don't blame him.

I could talk with real affection* about the gentle nuttiness of antique rural Anglican churches, but probably not a big seller in forum threads. :)

*They really are lovely people, at least 95% are over 65, half of them are over 80. Most Sundays the congregation doesn't top 20 and every head is grey, white, or bald. There is one non-white person and one transgender woman and one 106 year old woman. Four churches, each gets a service once a month. Not one building has running water/bathroom. Thy all work like slaves several days a month to help fund upkeep on the buildings and pay the priest, but no matter how urgently they are told they must make decisions regarding amalgamating, none of them will countenance the idea of closing any of these tiny churches.

It's the graveyards, I think. They all have close family and 200 years worth of ancestors buried in these grassy stone gardens and can't bear to think of them abandoned and neglected.

  • Brother Daniel
  • Global Moderator
  • predisposed to antagonism
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #5
Random church-related post, not connected to anything in particular:

Circa 2001-2003 (I can't remember the precise years so I'm guessing) I regularly attended a church in downtown Dartmouth.  (Denom:  United Church of Canada.)  I remember one Sunday when I was sitting up in the balcony.  My son (born 2000, so rather young at the time) was with me, probably sitting on my lap.

Something happened that made me react by standing up, with Boo in my arms, and hurrying out of there.  I can't remember what it was exactly.  Maybe Boo was being fussy and loud, and I wanted to get him out of there so that we weren't disruptive.  Maybe it was something else.

I can walk both quickly and quietly when I have a mind to do so.  So, zooming out of there, near silently, except then

BOOM!

Forgot to duck.  That sound was my head hitting the top of the doorway leading out of the balcony.  Hard enough to make the whole church shake.

So much for stealth.

  • Brother Daniel
  • Global Moderator
  • predisposed to antagonism
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #6
Speaking of Boo and church:

In '08 my dad died.  I had turned heathen by then.  But of course I flew out west to go to the funeral and to try to be supportive of my mom.  Went out with Mrs D and Boo (age 8) and TG (age not-quite-2).

Went to my mom's (hardcore fundy Baptist) church that Sunday.  Didn't want to, but I judged it to be the wrong time to make waves.

Boo was shuffled off to Sunday School during the service.

As a visitor, he was asked what brought him there.  So he responded that he was in town for his grandpa's funeral.

Someone thought it was a teachable moment.  So he was asked, "And where is your grandpa now?"

Boo, having been at the burial, simply answered truthfully:  "In the ground."

There was a collective shocked indrawn breath.  He was "corrected" (with some reference to heaven) and then essentially shunned for the rest of the class.

He didn't tell me about this until another 5 years had gone by.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #7
Ow! Everyone looked at you immediately, I know. :D

At least rural churches become very informal. We had a few ladybugs bugging the ladies last Sunday. Lots of accompanying mirth as the spotty things were being extracted from hair and clothing and escorted outdoors.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #8
Post-theism in Canada:

United Church of Canada atheist congregation and minister in Scarborough, Ontario.

https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2015/03/16/atheist-minister-praises-the-glory-of-good-at-scarborough-church.html

One of Reverend Gretta Vosper's books, With or Without God

https://www.amazon.ca/Without-God-Gretta-Vosper/dp/1554684005

her website:

http://www.grettavosper.ca/

  • Bilirubin
  • Ain't nothing ta fuck wit'
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #9
Weird thing happened appropriate to this thread.

My cousin got married. Whereas that is not in and of itself weird, what was weird was that it was a catholic mass, and he had not converted (my family are weird ultra dispensationalists although now attend the same megachurch as Betsy DeVos). During communion I saw he received a blessing instead of a host. Naturally I had assumed he converted since the wedding was being held there, had no idea they did mixed marriages these days.

Was also funny that of the entirety of his side *one* person received the host, whereas of her side, *one* person remained in their seat :D And I had to prompt my family on the "may the force be with you" part.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #10
Awkward. :ohmy:

We had to have an interview with my familyès UCoC minister while making arrangements. When Mr. b admitted to being from a Catholic family, the reverend paused and said "That's not going to be a problem, is it"?

That these are still called 'mixed marriages' is a deeply weird aspect of Christianity.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #11
Nuh-uh. Some of us still prefer to see marriage as a yoke rather than a ball and chain.  :yes:

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #12
Weird thing happened appropriate to this thread.

My cousin got married. Whereas that is not in and of itself weird, what was weird was that it was a catholic mass, and he had not converted (my family are weird ultra dispensationalists although now attend the same megachurch as Betsy DeVos). During communion I saw he received a blessing instead of a host. Naturally I had assumed he converted since the wedding was being held there, had no idea they did mixed marriages these days.

Was also funny that of the entirety of his side *one* person received the host, whereas of her side, *one* person remained in their seat :D And I had to prompt my family on the "may the force be with you" part.

I'd bet it was somewhat of a different mix when it came to knelling. Except, of course, for the genuflect.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #13
Post-theism in Canada:
"Post-theism" is an oxymoron.   :yes:

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #14
Maybe.

I like to see folks get along though, grit, and also not be lonely because of their isms.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #15
with Boo in my arms...
BOOM!...
Speaking of Boo and church...  and then essentially shunned for the rest of the class.
Well there's the situation... with a name like "Boo", one must expect the jarring of public appearances. That's why one should probably think twice before naming their child Raspberry, Catcall, or MockingJay, even if one enjoys the movies.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #16
Maybe.

I like to see folks get along though, grit, and also not be lonely because of their isms.
But some folk can do both. Why not both?

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #17
I mean, we all return to Jesus eventually. It's only polite to bring a housewarming gift.

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #18
Both is fine, grit. Some people can't do both, for as many reasons as you can think of. Or won't, as you probably can also imagine reasons for.

Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #19
Love is like a magic penny
 if you hold it tight you won't have any
if you give it away you'll have so many
they'll be rolling all over the floor

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #20
God hates Jesus
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/02/health/tattoo-infected-sepsis-death-vibrio-study/index.html
Well, obviously tats are of the debil, regardless of what they say. It's the same principle behind Mormon signposts of "Jesus was here", the 'Buddy Christ' getting struck by lightning, or all those Canadian fits of "Holy laughter".   :yes:

  • borealis
  • Administrator
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #21
I mean, we all return to Jesus eventually. It's only polite to bring a housewarming gift.
That is what many people believe, for sure. But some of us, possibly quite a lot of us, are not seemingly able to believe, and many who seemingly believe also seem to be not very friendly or giving or loving at all.

I have to say I Iike my elderly rural Anglicans a lot though, they are pretty consistently kind and lovely other than the occasional unpleasantness over moving the altar a bit away from the window so the clerics can squeeze in behind it. (it was in that spot since 1842, no, we cannot move it.)

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #22
Scots-Irish Presby traditions can be especially harsh.
True story -
See, we Reformed types, well, for the most part we don't curry favour with pictures of Jesus or any of the Godhead. Most of us aren't Muslim about it, but it's a trademark of conservative Presbyterianism. Well, it's not a point that comes up often in a communicants class in preparation for ones melding into the collective, and even if it were, a lot of the 'purists' still make exception for cartoonish renderings for teaching children, as long as it isn't intended as real.

My brother's church had a family who joined the church, and it was soon after the church built their first meeting structure. This new family gave the church some artwork for the new place - a classic picture of Jesus wouldn't you know it. It was refused. I don't know much of the details, but the family left over it.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #23
But some of us, possibly quite a lot of us, are not seemingly able to believe, and many who seemingly believe also seem to be not very friendly or giving or loving at all.
:sadyes:  Y'all gotz the Satan mud on ur eyes. The same thing happened to the dinosaurs.

  • grit
  • redolent needling balm
Re: I've returned to Jesus
Reply #24
Sleep well, b.